ISSUE 52 December 8th 2000
		H E L L O . . . This week some of the worst pop videos of all time were revealed. All the usual classics were there: Duran Duran’s ‘Wild Boys’, and of course Mick Jagger and David Bowie’s infamous impression of two C&A mannequins on speed in ‘Dancing In The Street’. But the video that really takes the biscuit is Lionel Richie’s tasteless promo for ‘Hello’. It’s a comedy classic! Lionel singing to a blind girl "Hello, is it me you’re looking for?". Yep, old pervert Lionel falls in love with his ‘blind angel’, who can’t see him (obviously), but still manages to produce a hand crafted clay model of him by the end of the video. Dirty old sex monkey Lionel spends the entire video watching her, as she makes her ‘clay masterpiece’. (It was in fact a model of a poodle, but it did look an awful lot like Lionel in 1985!) And what a wave of shit it was! First off, the video was a complete shambles from start to finish, because for the first two weeks they actually used a real blind girl. Unfortunately, she was never seen again after she ran through a fire exit and tried to hug a moving lorry! (She was actually meant to run through a classroom door and hug Lionel). They then got an actress to play the part of the love struck girl, and she must of spent the whole time wishing she really was blind after Lionel walked around set with his huge donkey cock out, not realising she wasn’t actually blind! BEN