ISSUE 26 June 9th 2000
		E L V I S J O N E S . . . . I've read some shit in my time, but this one takes the biscuit. Remember the 'crock of shit story' about some woman called 'Mary' who'd never had sex, but then ends up with a baby called 'Jesus' who was able to turn 'water into Pepsi'. Well, here comes another huge turd all the way from that island of 'freaks' that is Wales. Apparently, some old donkey with nothing more interesting in his life to do than look into the history of Cardiff, claims that Elvis actually came from Wales. According to Cardiff historian Terry Breverton (he could only be a Cardiff historian with that name) 'South of the Presili Mountains, there is an ancient chapel devoted to the Saint Elvis. So Elvis's family could have come from an area in Wales called the Presili mountains.' Well, thank you for that Terry. you’ll be telling us next that Bob Marley is from Swindon, and Bruce Spingsteen is actually from Weymouth. Terry, piss off and get a life. BEN.