June 16th 2000

O M O T H E R . . .
Talk about a ‘Lesbian Avalanche’. This week every drinker from the ‘furry cup’ of pop is going Loco in a desperate attempt to boost their dead as a Do-Do career.

And guess which beaver cleaner has jumped on the ‘Lesbo Express’ without a pink ticket? Well, it’s none other than Sinead ‘No hit since 1990’ O’ Conner. Yep,
we’ve got a live one!

Sinead broke the news to me exclusively from a Womens yoga festival.

She told me "I am a lesbian, I have not been comfortable with that fact until recently. I have striven to be ‘straight ‘ and to hide myself. But I have failed miserably with men. I love men, but I prefer romantic relationships with women. I’m sorry, but at least I’m outing myself’."

So there you have it, the whole pop apple is riddled with ‘gay pips’. Can I just say that I can completely understand where Sinead is coming from. I too prefer sex with women, but that’s because I’m a six foot blonde ‘Love bomb’ who like my father, is hung like a donkey. (Yes, my father was ‘hung like a donkey’. It was Spain 1983, when he was caught shop lifting!)

God, if this ‘Lesbian flood’ carries on at this rate, next they’ll be telling me KD Lang is queer!